![\"\"](\"http:\/\/yourinsidevoice.net\/wp-content\/uploads\/2012\/10\/DSC00140.jpg\" "\\"The")
<\/a>Our son took this photograph during mid-flight<\/p><\/div>\n
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We haven\u2019t given up our right, after all, to travel and be together as a family just because one of us can\u2019t speak and is prone to random melt downs, sudden gleeful noises and hand clapping that could bring someone back from the dead and another one of us is an eccentric individual who has interesting social interactions just about everywhere he goes, have we?\u00a0 And then there\u2019s the kids, of course.\u00a0 The freedom to travel is a constitutional right. The right of air travel is also specifically codified:\u00a0 “A citizen of the United States has a public right of transit through the navigable airspace.” 49 U.S.C. \u00a7 40103.<\/p>\n
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Some would say even if we have a right, we should not exercise it, because it is just inconsiderate to others.\u00a0 Out of an abundant sense of inferiority and guilt, we take extraordinary measures to minimize the disruption and inconvenience to our fellow travelers, by doing such things as:<\/p>\n
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- Only traveling on flights that do not come to close to sleep times or medication administration times [where possible].<\/li>\n
- Paying extra money for seats that are in the bulkhead so our kids can\u2019t kick people and rock in their chair and push back into others, or we sit behind each other to prevent that.<\/li>\n
- We throw ourselves on the mercy of the TSA and bring juice and other \u201cfavored\u201d drinks, take them out of our bag and allow them to be X-rayed to avoid thirsty howls at the gate or on board.\u00a0 Sometimes they get confiscated, sometimes we are subject to a lecture and shakedown, and sometimes we sail.<\/li>\n
- We take our daughter to the bathroom with increased frequency.\u00a0 Not easily done on an airplane.<\/li>\n
- We pack enough luggage to occupy a team of Sherpas so that the kids have toys, snacks, extra clothes, more extra clothes and plenty of things to do in the air.<\/li>\n
- My husband (or I, but usually he) will carry our almost 65 pound daughter when she is having an airport meltdown to try and keep her calm and to get us to the gate on time.<\/li>\n
- We sit in the middle seat to \u201cguard\u201d our children against the window and prevent limbs from going into the aisle or into neighboring persons.<\/li>\n<\/ul>\n
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I\u2019d posit that if you are flying on a commercial jet, you get what you get and it\u2019s really not our problem if you can\u2019t deal with it, particularly given everything we do above.\u00a0 By the way, for those who are lucky enough to sit next to us, we routinely offer to buy people a drink (or two).\u00a0 [The reaction of our neighbors to the offer of a drink shows us a lot about his or her character and gives us an idea of what our lives are going to be like for the next ___hours.<\/em>]\u00a0 Once, my husband tried to talk the pilot into letting our daughter sit in his lap for takeoff.\u00a0 The pilot refused, telling us he \u201cappreciated what we were dealing with and trying to do,\u201d but he felt safety was more important.\u00a0 I smiled and said, \u201cI understand, we are just trying to prevent a lot of angry people on the plane.\u201d\u00a0 His response:\u00a0 \u201cThat\u2019s too bad for them if they don\u2019t like it.\u00a0 They are going to have just learn to cope and stick it out.\u201d\u00a0 I think that\u2019s the right answer, and if nothing else, it bought insurance against some surly person yelling about the situation \u2013 we could just shrug and say \u201cSorry, the pilot said you have to sit down and cope.\u00a0 Only autistic people can carry on aboard this aircraft.\u201d<\/p>\n
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The real aspect of flying that is difficult for us \u2013 the one that makes life really hard \u2013 is that once the door closes, once we are up in the air at cruising altitude, sandwiched into that flying tin can of humanity, anything can happen, and often does.\u00a0 We have had some pretty rough times in the airport as well.\u00a0 Like the time our son refused to go home and went totally limp and fell on the floor of the terminal at Dulles or the time that some noise at BWI had our daughter screaming and holding her ears shut.\u00a0 We\u2019ve had good experiences and really bad experiences.\u00a0 On most trips, it is some of both.\u00a0 On a positive note, because I conceived of this blog post in the air, here\u2019s a shout out to those who have been especially nice and kind:<\/p>\n
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- The JetBlue flight attendant who gave us extra snacks and drinks and gave them to us early (before takeoff!) and was just all around nice to us.\u00a0 We wrote a letter to her supervisor complementing her and I will always try and fly JetBlue wherever possible (nope, wasn\u2019t paid to say that).<\/li>\n
- The flight attendant who winked and smiled at our son when he said \u201cWhy is this taking forever?\u201d when we were delayed and talked to him about \u201call the safety features of this Boeing 747-500,\u201d and actually kept him distracted for 20 minutes.<\/li>\n
- The random people who came up to us in the airport and told us that we were \u201creally special people\u201d and said \u201cGod bless you.\u201d<\/li>\n
- The lady who sat next to me and my son for a four hour flight and when we touched down, turned to me and said \u201cI\u2019d like to say you prepared me well, but candidly, he was better behaved than most adults I have flown with.\u201d<\/li>\n
- The man who laughed when we offered him a drink and who bought us one instead.<\/li>\n
- The lady who told a flight attendant about the passenger in front of us who turned around and called me a \u201cmoron\u201d when our son kicked his chair twice.<\/li>\n
- All the people through the years who have offered our kids cookies or snacks on board and told us that we were a really nice family.<\/li>\n<\/ul>\n
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I have two ideas to make flying a little less stressful and better for families with disabilities or special needs. My family has told me both of these are losers in terms of profitability, so I guess they will never happen.\u00a0 The first is a charter airline that only flies disabled passengers.\u00a0 I could just imagine what \u201cAutism Air\u201d might be like.\u00a0 As it turns out, there is a \u201clight\u201d version of this concept that offers charter flights for autistic children, but only for medical travel.<\/p>\n